You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize