I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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