you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
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