singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
