I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
