in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
