Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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