Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I think people are normalizing furries
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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