the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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