youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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