Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I think I have vodka in my lungs
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
