You really coming over, don't trick.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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