bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
