She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
