My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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