Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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