just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Randomize