He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
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