He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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