I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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