would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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