The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
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