worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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