Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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