In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
