I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He better not be in your backpack
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize