Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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