Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
