Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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