...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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