my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
