While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
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I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
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OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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