Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
