lets start a swedish sibling band together
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
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