At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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