I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize