Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize