if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
they're like a gay fantastic four
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
