He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
