Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
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