playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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