told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Congratulations! We have a period
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
