this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week