Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
