i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
