Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
HIV tests are more positive than that guy
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Randomize
