yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
