my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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