Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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