so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
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He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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