Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize